


See Through

by LilPyroCat



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Boys Kissing, Bucky Barnes Has PTSD, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky Barnes's Metal Arm, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, M/M, Misunderstandings, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Slow Burn, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-08-03 17:17:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16330271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilPyroCat/pseuds/LilPyroCat
Summary: Bucky had a small notebook, and in it were lists of words. Words that he associated with his memories mostly, but some he associated with people and places.But his longest, and most complicated lists were for Steve Rogers.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Since I can't seem to stop obsessing over these two, here is the product of my spare time. Enjoy!

* * *

Bucky had a small notebook, and in it were lists of words. Words that he associated with his memories mostly, but some he associated with people and places.

He had a list of words for the day he died, which he remembers only in painful parts.

 

  * __Fear__


  * _Falling_


  * _Cold_


  * _Pain_


  * _Numb_


  * _Gone_



He had a list of words for Sgt. James Buchanan Barnes, who he knows he used to be, a very long time ago. These words were difficult to find, and he adds to it slowly, as vague memories returned of Before.

 

  * __Pride__


  * _Confident_


  * _Loyal_


  * _War_


  * _Dancing_


  * _Happy_



He had a list of words for the Winter Soldier too. Though those were difficult to write, they weren't hard to find.

 

  * __Asset__


  * _Anger_


  * _Cold_


  * _Pain_


  * _Merciless_


  * _Violence_


  * _Blood_


  * _Bullets_


  * _Blade_


  * _Murderer_


  * _Monster_



He had lots of lists, for lots of things.

People; Natasha, Nick Fury. Tony Stark.

That list was difficult too.

 

  * __Guilt__


  * _Betrayal_


  * _Unforgivable_



He had lists for things he was still getting used to. The 21st century, modern technology. He even had a list for food, since there was a huge difference between what was available when he had been Bucky Barnes to now.

He had lists for his memories. Before the war, during it. Of the men he fought beside, the men he killed… both during and after the war.

But his longest, and most complicated lists were for Steve Rogers. He had more than one, because there were different times and different memories, and he wanted to keep them sorted.

It was actually Sam's idea. Since he knew quite a bit about PTSD and veterans, even though Bucky wouldn't really class himself as a veteran of the usual calibre. But Sam suggested that Bucky writing things down to help keep his mind sorted would help keep him grounded.

Bucky didn't really know why he settled on lists of words, considering what a list of words used to be able to do to him. While they were harmless now, the thought of them still triggered a panicked reaction on occasion. For some reason though, the simplicity of his lists was a comfort to him. Words he was in control of, that didn't control him. Words that came from his own mind, not from someone else's.

* * *

It had been two years since the whole fiasco with Zemo. Most of the first year he had spent in cytostasis, hoping that they could remove the conditioning from his mind once and for all. When he was woken up, he was surprised. Part of him had honestly expected not to be woken up at all. Not after all that had happened, all he'd done.

So to be greeted with an extraordinarily excited young Wakandan girl who claimed she was able to fix him was just a bit of a shock, to say the least.

It had taken a while, and it was difficult, but somehow, Shuri was able to reset the commands in his mind, until the conditioning was all but a painful memory. Shuri was kind to him, despite often treating him as a lab rat when she had the opportunity.

Bucky didn't mind that though. At least Shuri asked permission, and explained everything she was doing in great detail. Bucky suspected it was as much to keep him calm and informed as to show off what she was capable of. And if he said no, she never pressed him. It was a refreshing change after everything else he'd experienced in a lab.

When T’Challa came to check up on his sister's progress, it was surprisingly easy to get along with him. Bucky was awkward at first, unsure if the king was still holding a grudge for his role in everything. But T'Challa was patient with him, explaining that he held no animosity towards him. After a while, Bucky even considered him to be a friend.

His time in Wakanda was peaceful, for the most part. Unfortunately, no matter what fiddling Shuri did in his mind, nothing stopped the nightmares, and the occasional accidental trigger. But without his arm, Bucky wasn't able to do a whole lot of damage, to himself or anyone else.

Surrounded by a beautiful landscape and no conflict, Bucky could almost say it was perfect.

Almost.

Except it was almost a year and a half since he'd last seen Steve. His best friend, the man who saved him, and pretty much his sole reason for even existing anymore. And he missed him terribly.

Bucky had been caught up on the fallout of the time he'd missed while asleep again, so he knew that Steve had rescued the others from the prison they'd been taken to. He also knew that Tony Stark had not taken any action against him doing so, something that confused Bucky to no end considering how hard the man had tried to kill him before. Unfortunately, without Steve there to ask, he would have to keep wondering about it.

But knowing that the others were safe and not stuck in cells was a comfort to him. He knew that Steve kept in contact with T'Challa and Shuri, but he never came to visit.

Steve probably had his reasons. Too busy fighting the good fight, and all that usual stuff Steve was likely to do. But it didn't mean that it hurt Bucky's feelings any less.

So, after he'd woken from a particularly nasty nightmare that involved a whole lot of dead friends that he definitely did not want to remember, he went to find T'Challa. He found him overlooking the city from his throne room, looking pensive as always.

“When did you last hear from Steve?”

T'Challa looked at Bucky with a raised eyebrow, a knowing look in his eye. “Your friend is doing just fine, Barnes. You need not be concerned.”

Bucky let out the breath he was holding. “That’s good. But… when?”

The king studied Bucky for a moment before answering. “Yesterday morning. Why do you ask?”

Bucky raised his remaining hand to his neck a little self consciously. “I… haven't seen or heard from him. Not since…”

T'Challa's eyes lit with understanding. “You miss him.”

“Well… yeah.”

“It is understandable,” T'Challa nodded, smiling. “However, Captain Rogers wished to let you recover without him, ah, what was it he said? 'Hovering like a mother hen’, I believe was how he put it.”

Bucky huffed out a laugh. That idiot. Of course he would think that being around would probably hurt Bucky's chances of recovery. T'Challa clapped a hand on his shoulder companionably.

“You seem to be in perfectly good health to me, my friend. Perhaps you would like me to arrange for him to visit?”

Bucky would deny to the end of his days how enthusiastic his nod was. It was almost embarrassing really, it wasn't like he'd been without company unless he wanted to be while he's been awake, but while they were good people in Wakanda, they just weren't _his_ people.

So when he heard from Shuri a day later that Steve was coming in a few days, he felt happier than he had in months. His response must have been more obvious than he realised though, since Shuri was immediately attentive to his smile.

“You never smile like that, only when you talk about him.”

“Like what?”

Shuri gestures to Bucky’s face. “Like how you just were. Stupid happy grin.”

Bucky pulled a face and gave Shuri a light shove. “He's my best friend, why wouldn't I be happy to see him, huh?”

Shuri just raised an eyebrow in a manner startlingly similar to her brother's. “Uh huh. Well, Sergeant Barnes, in light of your upcoming visit, I have something for you.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Bucky. How many times do I have.to tell you?”

Shuri just laughed and turned on her heel, gesturing for him to follow. He sighed and followed, only slightly apprehensive. The last time Shuri had something for him, he had somehow ended up being the test dummy for a new blaster gauntlet she had designed. He still had the aches to prove it, although the bruises healed within days.

When they reached the bottom floor of Shuri's lab, she was practically bouncing with excitement. Bucky eyed her warily.

“What could possibly be so exciting to show me? I'm not going to be target practice again am I?”

“No, stupid,” Shuri laughed, “I am just really proud of it. Come, look!”

Bucky wandered over to where she was standing. On the table was an oblong case. He frowned. “What's this?”

“Open it,” Shuri urged him, so he did.

And he stared.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Shuri's face drop slightly. “I just thought… if you don't like it, you don't -”

“It's beautiful,” Bucky whispered, reaching out tentatively to touch the sleek metal of the arm in the case. He knew without asking that it was made of vibranium. The shape wasn't so different from his old one, just smoother. But the colour was different.

Gone was the stark silver metal and red star that had once marked him as Hydra’s; this new arm was a deep blue, with gold accents. The blue reminded him of Steve's uniform, and he squinted at Shuri suspiciously.

“Why blue?”

She looked at him innocently. “I thought it was a nice colour. Absolutely no other reason.”

Bucky didn't believe her for a second. He glanced down at the scarf he wore to hide the remainder of his left arm. It would be strange to have one back.

“What do you say then, Barnes,” Shuri said impatiently. “You want me to put it on?”

Bucky considered it for a moment longer. “What about the rest of the old one?”

Shuri smiled. “That won't be a problem.”

A couple of hours and some adjustments later, Bucky's new arm was attached. The remains of the old one we're all but gone, only a few mechanisms that Shuri said would have caused too  much trauma to remove.

He flexed the joints and fingers, marvelling at how much lighter it was than his old one, more of a comfortable weight. He was also impressed with how effortlessly Shuri had managed to attach the sensors to the nerve endings in his shoulders.

She was grinning again. “Pick something up.”

Bucky sighed good naturedly, and reached for a pen on the table, picking it up with the cool metal of his new left hand. He drew a sharp breath. He could feel the weight of the pen in his hand, could feel the texture of the rubber hand grip. He stared at his arm, then at Shuri.

“I can _feel_ it.”

Shuri nodded, her smile somewhat softer now. “You told me before, one of the hardest things to get used to was having no real sense of touch in your old arm, only pressure. So, I did my best to replicate nerve endings and the sensation of touch in the entire design. It's not as sensitive as a biological one, of course, but -”

Bucky cut her off by hugging her suddenly. She was shocked for a moment, before cautiously hugging him back. It was rare that Bucky initiated physical contact other than a handshake, so he wasn't offended by her tentativeness.

“Thank you, Shuri, thank you.” Bucky said earnestly when he pulled away. He held the arm up at eye level, admiring the smooth way it followed his movements. _Nothing_ about this new arm was even comparable to the Soldier's. And that alone meant more to Bucky than he could ever express to Shuri in words, so he simply beamed at her.

“Honestly, it's amazing. Thank you so much, I don't know how I'll ever repay you.”

Shuri smiled gently. “You don't have to.”

Bucky shook his head. "Someday I will. You have no idea how much this means to me."

She just grinned shrugged, but Bucky could see that she was inordinately pleased. She spent a short amount of time having a look over the arm and making sure it was all working perfectly before ushering him back out of her lab. 

Bucky wandered back towards the small but he was living in. It felt strange, having two arms swinging by his sides, but it felt good in a way. On his way back, he happened across Okoye, who called out to him in greeting.

"Sergeant Barnes! I see Shuri has had her fun with you today."

Bucky smiled happily, and raised his left arm. "She has outdone herself, it's beautiful."

"That it is," Okoye agreed, looking it over with a smile. She eyed him curiously. "Care to test it out?"

Bucky grinned and rolled his shoulders. "You better not scratch it."

Okoye just laughed.

Sparring sessions with the captain of the Wakandan guard was an interesting experience, particularly when Bucky only had one arm. Okoye had offered to help him learn to fight with his disadvantage, "just in case".

Okoye fought primarily with a spear, but was excellent with close range combat as well. Bucky, on the other hand, is a lot better at hand to hand combat and is still an excellent marksman. He's pretty handy with a knife though, which evens the odds between them.

This time, he had two arms to use. He was pleased to find that his instincts were as sharp as ever, and that his new arm cooperated even better than the old one. Okoye responded by being more aggressive than usual, and before long, both were panting and sporting more than a few bruises.

Okoye smiled and nodded her approval. "I think it will do just fine."

Bucky flopped to the ground and sighed. "It's just nice to feel a little more normal."

Okoye patted his head affectionately, taking full advantage of the fact that Bucky has no energy to stop her. 

"And you'll be seeing your friend again soon, yes?"

Bucky looked at her, surprised. "Yeah."

Smiling knowingly, Okoye brushed off her uniform and offered her hand to help him up. "It will do you good to see him. It has been a long time, hasn't it?"

"Year, five months, two weeks," Bucky replied morosely. "Apparently he didn't want to ruin my chances of recovery. Idiot."

"He is a good friend," Okoye said thoughtfully. "But perhaps not the brightest, hmm?"

Bucky snorted. "Sounds about right."

But even though he was still a little annoyed with Steves's reason for staying away and not talking to him, Bucky couldn't bring himself to actually stay mad. He was going to get to see him in a couple of days, and that was good enough for him.

Later that day, Bucky added a new word to one of his lists for Steve.


	2. Chapter 2

It didn't matter how many times the nightmares came, Bucky still woke screaming most nights. It was one of many reasons he chose to live alone rather than closer to other people. The last thing he wanted to do was to unnecessarily disturb people. The nightmares wasn't something that he thought were ever going to go away, so he just did his best to live with them.

Some nights were harder than others. The nights when the reality of his past blended into his fears for the future, and he would find himself responsible for the deaths his friends, or having to watch himself kill them through the eyes of the Soldier, like he had done for so many years.

Those were the nights he was most grateful for not having anyone to witness him afterwards. Before he's lost his arm - again - and before he had regained most of his lost memories, there had been times when he woke up swinging. Residual instinct making him think he was back under Hydra's control, and wanting to lash out at those who were controlling him. It was less likely to happen after he lost his arm and his mind became more calm, but it still happened.

It was a horrid kind of karma really, that the night before he knew he would be seeing Steve, that he had one of the worst nightmares he'd had in a long time.

_ He was back on that helicarrier, the pain, rage and confusion fresh in his mind as the day itself. Steve, bloody and beaten, refusing to fight back. His willingness to die for a man who barely resembled the one he used to know ripping a bleeding hole in his heart. It was almost the same, but not. This time, when Steve fell, Bucky didn't make it in time. By the time he pulled him out of the water, Steve wasn't breathing. A faceless Hydra agent was waiting, congratulating the Soldier on successfully eliminating his target. Bucky screamed in anguish, clutching the body of his dead friend: the only person who had ever meant a damn thing to him. Dead. Because of him. _

Bucky woke still screaming, his throat raw and both arms swinging for that faceless enemy. Tangled in sheets and half delirious, he managed to topple himself out of his bed and onto the floor, just about managing to catch himself before smacking face first into the ground. The impact jerked him fully out of his nightmare and the screams died away.

Sighing, Bucky let himself drop to the ground. “I fucking hate this,” he muttered to himself, words muffled by the floor. “My brain hates me. And I hate it.”

“Talking to yourself now, Barnes?”

Bucky froze. He very slowly turned his head towards the door. T'Challa was in the doorway, and looked like he'd been there for some time. Bucky groaned and hid his face in the ground again.

“I'm gonna put bell on you, I swear.”

T'Challa chuckled. “You aren't the only one to threaten me with that you know.”

Muttering some of the more creative expletives he knew, Bucky pulled himself to his feet and brushed himself off, attempting to make himself look at least a little less like he had fallen out of bed. He pushed his hair back from his face, grimacing at the tangles before sighing and giving up.

“Was there something you needed, or is this a social call?”

“A little of both.” T'Challa replied, more seriously. “Shuri told me you were getting rather anxious about seeing Steven, I wanted to make sure you were alright.”

Bucky shrugged. “I'm a little nervous yeah, I guess.”

“The way you woke…”

“Is pretty normal,” Bucky interrupted tiredly. “Unfortunately. One of the many downsides of PTSD. Why do you think I prefer to live so far away from everyone else?”

T'Challa nodded in understanding. “As long as you are doing okay, my friend. You know we will do anything we can to help you.”

Bucky nodded. “Of course. I think this is the kind of thing that needs time. It'll probably never go away. I deal.”

Bucky pretended not to see the obvious pity in the king's eyes, and his annoyance at it. T'Challa was only trying to help. “What was the other thing then?”

T'Challa suddenly looked a little sheepish. “I, ah, need some assistance in a rather personal matter.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow. “What kind of personal?”

The king looked even more embarrassed. “You don't have to help me, I just wanted someone who was less likely to mock me or to make such a big deal-”

“T'Challa,” Bucky interrupted, more and more confused by the second. “Just say it.”

“I wish to ask Nakia to marry me. Properly.”

There was a long silence in which Bucky wondered if he had heard correctly and T'Challa grew visibly more uncomfortable.

“Okay so… just so I'm understanding this,” Bucky said slowly, frowning. “You want me to help you… with a proposal?”

Looking somewhat relieved, T'Challa nodded. “Yes. If you would. I am not exactly, ah, the best at this kind of thing. Nakia…. She makes me forget myself. Ask Okoye and Shuri, they tease me mercilessly.”

“And you're asking me… why?”

“Because if I ask my mother she will cause a fuss and get too many people involved, Shuri will make fun of me, Okoye will judge me for having to ask, and W'Kabi will likely give me awful advice.” T'Challa smiled wryly. “Plus, I admire your natural charm, Barnes. I thought you would be able to help me best.”

Startled, Bucky laughed. “Sure, why not. It's not like I'm doing much else useful. What do you need?”

A few hours later, Bucky and T'Challa were walking through the market discussing the bizarre behaviour of women.

“Nakia does not wish to remain in Wakanda permanently, so I'm happy to support her doing what she wishes,” T'Challa was saying, “but she still seems to get frustrated with me if I do not spend time with her. It is baffling.”

“Yeah, women can be very confusing,” Bucky agreed, going by his memories of his time before the war. He remembered taking a lot of women out; dancing, dinner, a movie. He recalled being good with women. But he doubted his experience would have much use in modern times. “They're definitely more confusing now than they used to be. I like that though, I've met a lot of strong women that I admire greatly. And Nakia seems like she has a very strong will of her own.”

“That she does,” T'Challa smiled, getting a faraway look in his eye that made Bucky chuckle. 

“You want my honest opinion? Don't overthink this. A grand gesture will more than likely be a waste. Take her to her favourite place. Do something she enjoys. And ask her straight, tell her exactly how much she means to you.”

T'Challa nodded thoughtfully. “You might be onto something there. She never was into anything very fancy… and always did poke fun at any long speeches. Perhaps simplicity is a better approach.”

“Definitely less to be nervous about,” Bucky laughed, bumping his shoulder playfully. “When will she be back next?”

“In a few weeks,” he sighed. “I miss her.”

Bucky nodded. “Yeah, I know.” 

T'Challa looked at him curiously. “May I ask you a personal question, Barnes?”

“Uhhh sure?”

“You and Steven. You are very close, yes?”

Bucky thought about it for a while. “I know we used to be. Practically brothers. Then there was the war… and then I died. Since then…. I don't know. He saved my life. More than once. He never gave up on me. He's my best friend… but I tried to kill him, more than once. So… I don't know. Things aren't really the same anymore.”

T'Challa looked infinitely sad. “He cares about you greatly. I've never met a man who cared about his friends so much. You're lucky to have him.”

“Yeah. I am.” Bucky smiled proudly. “He's a good man. Always was. And an absolute saint for putting up with me and all my bullshit.”

“Ehh you're not so bad.”

“Pfft. Thanks.”

They both laughed, but somewhere in the back of his mind, Bucky still wondered why Steve did so much for him, when Bucky did nothing in return.

After leaving T'Challa to deal with his kingly duties, Bucky pondered on it some more. He thought about the advice he'd given to T'Challa about Nakia. Steve had always been one for grand gestures and passionate speeches, even before the war. It was something Bucky had always found endearing about him. 

He had saved Bucky's life countless times in different ways. Bucky had saved him a couple of times, sure, but that was nowhere near enough to make up for everything he'd put him through. He owed Steve his life. He owed him everything.

And Bucky decided then and there, he was going to make damn sure he made up for all the bad stuff, if it killed him.

The only question was how.

* * *

 

Bucky didn't realise until he got back to his home that he didn't actually know when Steve would be arriving. He knew it would be some time that afternoon, but since he was technically a fugitive, he had to travel under the radar. 

So naturally, Bucky didn't expect to find him sitting outside, eyes closed and face turned up to the sun.

He looked different. His hair was longer. He had more facial hair than Bucky had ever seen him with. And he was wearing civilian clothing, which for some reason, was the most bizarre thing to Bucky. The Captain America uniform was such a huge part of Steve's personally, it was hard to imagine him without it. Although, Bucky guessed, Steve probably didn't go by Captain America anymore.

Steve looked so peaceful. It made Bucky feel more calm just seeing him. He could feel his shoulders relax and a smile spread across his face.

“Steve.”

“Bucky.” Steve opened his eyes and smiled in that way that made his eyes crinkle. “You look good.”

“You look different.”

Steve rubbed at his beard. “Yeah… felt like a change. It's been a tough couple of years.”

“So I've heard.” Bucky couldn't help the small amount of accusation that found its way into his voice. Steve sighed.

“Buck…”

“Why'd you stay away so long?” Bucky blurted out, harsher than he intended it too. He sounded like a sulky child, even to his own ears. He hated that Steve had stopped smiling.

“I didn't want to make anything more difficult for you Buck. You deserved peace and quiet after everything you've been through.”

Bucky snorted and folded his arms across his chest, which caught Steve's attention. 

“Your arm-”

“Don't change the subject, Steve. You could have come to visit, at least once. Or called. Or hell, even a letter. I've had nothing for a year and a half.”

Steve looked guilty, and Bucky immediately felt awful. “Steve, I-”

“No, you're right,” he sighed. “I was being a coward. I knew you'd be looked after here and... I didn't know whether you'd even want to see me, honestly. I wanted you to be happy, not to get dragged into any more trouble. I figured staying out of your life would help that.”

Bucky shook his head and went to sit next to his friend. “You're really an idiot, Rogers. You know that?”

It was a small smile, but it was there, and that alone made Bucky feel a lot better. “Yeah, I know. Guess some things don't change, huh?”

“Punk.”

“Jerk.”

Steve was smiling properly again now.

“So how are you?”

Bucky shrugged. “I'm good. No more trigger words. Brand new arm. No more running from people. I like it here.”

Steve nodded happily. “Glad to hear it. The arm is from Shuri?”

Bucky stretched the arm in question out in front of him. “Yep. Practically nothing of the old one left now.”

“It's beautiful.” Steve flushed a light pink. “Uh, I mean…”

Bucky sniggered. “It's fine.”

“It suits you.” Steve reached out a hand but stopped short of actually touching Bucky's arm. “Can I?”

“Go ahead.”

Steve ran a tentative hand over the smooth metal, and Bucky had to bite back a sharp breath. He could feel the warmth of his hand, the texture of the calluses on his palm. The sensation was more overwhelming than he expected it to be.

Steve must have noticed his reaction, and pulled his hand back immediately. “I'm sorry!”

Bucky shook his head quickly. “It's fine. It's just - Shuri, she made it so I can actually  _ feel _ things. It was just unexpected. That's all.”

Steve gaped. “She could do that? That's incredible!”

“Tell me about it, she's a genius.”

Steve reached out again and poked Bucky's shoulder. “So what can you feel? Pressure? Temperature?”

“Both. And texture. It's almost like my other arm.”

“Amazing.” Steve was in awe. He looked at Bucky and grinned. “They're definitely treating you well, aren't they?”

Bucky nodded happily. They sat in companionable silence for a while, simply enjoying the feeling of the afternoon sun and each others company. It felt right.

Eventually, Steve broke the silence.

“So have you been making friends?”

“What are you, my mom?” Bucky snorted. “Yeah I guess. T'Challa and Shuri seem to like me. And Okoye enjoys helping me keep in shape. I keep to myself, mostly.”

Steve didn't seem very surprised. “You live quite far from everyone else.”

“I like my privacy.” Bucky shrugged. “Nothing against the people here, it's just…. They're not really my people. Does that make sense?”

Steve nodded slowly. “I guess. Do you miss back home?”

“I don't really have a home over there anymore,” he reminded Steve. “But I missed you.”

Steve's face went pink again. Bucky decided it was adorable. “I'm sorry.”

Bucky waved his apology away. “Don't. I get it. Doesn't matter anymore. To be done more than enough for me, I can forgive you for trying to do what's best for me.” Bucky paused. “You’ve been looking after yourself though, right?”

Steve paused a second too long before answering. “Of course.”

“Steve.”

He pulled a face. “I'm… trying. It's hard for me to switch off.”

Bucky shook his head. Of course, Steve was always putting other people before himself. “You're gonna stay here for a while. Relax.  _ Properly _ relax.”

Steve opened his mouth to argue and Bucky prodded his chest with a metal finger. “No buts, workaholic. Everyone needs time to switch off and relax, and you're long overdue. Just a few days, at least. Come on, I want to catch up on everything I'm missing out there.”

Steve rolled his eyes, but nodded. “Fine, if you're gonna insist. I'll stay a few days.”

Bucky grinned wide and tried not to think too hard about the way his stomach flipped when Steve responded with a smile of his own. He thought about the word he added to Steve's lists a couple of days ago. It was one of the lists that was to do with the emotions and feelings he associated with Steve, a list that was both simple and complex, just because emotions were something that Bucky still had issues with sometimes.

 

 

  * __Guilt__


  * _Protective_


  * _Loyal_


  * _Determined_


  * _Safety_


  * **_Happiness_**



 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure where the idea of T'Challa wanting Bucky to help him with a proposal came from... It seemed like a good idea at the time. As promised though, an update!   
> (Don't expect this kind of consistency though, I had a day off work)


End file.
